Friday, August 5, 2011

nuclear blast from the past

Been a couple of days, I know, but I had some personal stuff to sort out...blasts from the past sort of things. Definitely not something I wanted back in my life but something that I knew eventually would happen.  My son got in contact with his biological father and I tried very hard to be supportive even in light of the ex's inability to "remember" beating me or that he had done anything to hurt me.  And the "if" apology (you know, if I did anything to hurt you, etc.) was no apology at all.  Ironically, his present wife bragged to my son that bio dad had "rescued" her from an abusive situation. 

I'm better now.  Firstborn is taking it slow and although not convinced his bio dad doesn't remember (there is a history of drug usage), knows how badly I was hurt.

As a result I had a bit of an emotional meltdown and got next to nothing done the past two days.  My back is still sore so I haven't gone out to harvest the tobacco yet but the whole garden looks abandoned because of the weeds.  I'll get out tomorrow when Zach mows the yard and get it done.

I've been knitting mitered squares out of sock yarn and worsted yarn as well.  I'm thinking of making a patchwork jacket out of the worsted weight.  The sock yarn will just accumulate until I have enough for a blanket.  Which will probably be when I'm reaching triple digits on my age.

Otherwise absolutely nothing is going on here so there's nothing much to write about.  I slept 14 hours last night which doesn't make up for the two previous nights of 3-4 hours of sleep each night, but it's certainly better than a third night running.

Well, off to make some lunch and get the inside cleaned up so I can work outside this weekend.

TTFN


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, Kathy, that is some heavy shit. I'd have had a meltdown too. Intense. And then your back. Well, that's not surprising given the intense stuff going down.

I feel you about the weeds. I have my vegetable garden up and producing but the weeds are awful. I haven't had time or ability to weed this summer and it's out of control. Kind of frustrating.

I hope your back heals up quickly and I hope your situation with your son and ex don't stress you out anymore. Hugs and love to you.

Kathy said...

I knew the day was coming for several years as Stephen has always wanted to at least talk to him, and I even gave him all the information I had about him and his family. But I was a bit overwhelmed by the total blanking out of all the abuse. Not to mention the rewriting of history with all the supposed things he did with Stephen. Stuff that never happened. He insisted that I had kept Stephen from him as if he had been a good father and I was a total bitch.

Stephen told him he wouldn't listen to anything bad about either me or his dad.

My back is giving me problems this morning. I'm positive my weight is 99% of the problem. sigh

Thanks so much, Tana. I hope your back feels better, too.