Monday, May 30, 2011

Happy Memorial Day

I hope everyone is enjoying this weekend. 

We woke up early yesterday and mowed the yard before the big storm hit.  Still waiting for a big storm to hit as all we got was a little thunder in the distance and some light rain.  Happy to have the yard done though.  I need to find a tiller to get the garden ready.  My tomatoes are outgrowing their little green house on the rack in front of the window.  So are the tobacco plants.  I still have time on the peppers since I had to re-plant those.  I just wish I had the energy to get it done.  I've been napping most of the day.

It's really hot today...near 90, I believe although it's very windy.  I've been napping in front of my fan because the wind that's coming in through the window is hot.  The sun will go down in a few hours and then the wind will cool off a bit.  I've got the window fan in my north window, which puts it right next to my bed.  And I mean right next to it.  Fortunately it's got a thermostat in it so if it gets too cool at night it will shut off.  I put it there because that side is in the shade most of the time and because the pets can lie on the bed in front of it.

Not sure what to do for supper.  Tom brought home nearly all the food he took up, including 5 pounds of hamburger.  I had bought 5 pounds for us so we're good for a few weeks.  I"m thinking sloppy joes tonight and some chips.  We have a lot of chips.  And hamburger buns.  Plus it's too hot to do much in the kitchen.  I don't have the screens in the kitchen and bathroom yet.  I'll work on that tomorrow.

I'm making a lot of progress on the curtain for the front door.  I'm more than halfway there and as it's lightweight, I don't think there will be much sag from the weight of it.  But it's hot on my legs and trying to knit while holding it away from my skin is awkward.  I could work on the pinwheel baby blanket as it's not long enough to drape just yet.  Or the two color baby blanket that is made from sport baby yarn and very lightweight. 

I should go start supper now and then spend the evening watching movies and knitting.  I'm on disk 3 of the last season of Farscape, making my way to the interviews and behind the scenes stuff before checking The Peacekeepers Wars from the library.  I don't own that yet.  Since I just spent money on new bras and a prosthesis I'll hold off on that for a couple of months.

Hopefully I'll get some pictures of things added to my blog from now on.  Zach is going to sit down with me and show me how to use the new camera.  I also need to decide what I'm going to do with my other blog.  I'd like to keep it but make some changes on how I interpret it.  I'd like to make some changes to this one as well, but not so drastic.  Just make it more interesting and more about my crafting and less whining about how I don't feel good all the time.  In the meantime, though, I'm going to go about business as usual.  Drastic changes never work for me.


Thursday, May 26, 2011

I'm not a lawyer, nor do I play one on tv

I've been busily knitting on the pinwheel baby blanket.  I'm using two size 8 circular needles now as it's gotten so big that I wasn't able to knit very quickly.  And I'll have to add a third pretty soon.  Making good progress on the other baby blanket as well but I didn't work on the mittens last night because I started the curtain for my front door.  I would post the pattern here but as I disagree strongly with this "trend" in designers telling customers what they must do with their finished product, I won't be promoting her designs.  Ever.  What some designers don't realize (or won't acknowledge) is that copyright covers only the written words, not the finished object.  Someone on Ravelry contacted the U.S. Copyright office and got that definitive statement from them.  I have old pattern books from the 1980s that tell knitters and crocheters how to sell their finished objects from the designs they use.  So this is just a "trend" that someone out there decided their hard work in designing entitled them to controlling what someone else's hard hours of work, not to mention cost of yarn, should also entitle them to.

So if they want to insist on being a bully about it, fine.  But they won't get a penny from me, nor will they get any free advertising from me.  Many designers have now stopped adding these restrictions on their patterns because they've come to realize it's not only wrong, it could be illegal as well.  Lion Brand and Red Heart's patterns have no such restrictions on them and that should tell you something.

I have to add, though, that other countries laws are a bit different.  In England, for instance, their copyright laws do cover the finished product and it's confusing to me whether we in America are supposed to honor their laws or if we're under the jurisdiction of just our laws.  I don't buy a lot of patterns anyway (and don't buy magazines anymore because they have that unethical restriction on what I can do with my finished product) but I personally would honor the laws of the country the designer lived in.  But that's just me.

Still, I don't get why designers are entitled to money (which they have been compensated for their hard work by the price of the pattern) but I'm not entitled to compensation for the money spent on yarn or the many hours of my talented effort put into the product.  Bottom line is, I am.  The U.S. Copyright office says so.

And the crap about licensing is bogus as well.  If anyone tries to sell you a cottage license so you can sell your finished product...well, I'm pretty sure that's simply illegal.  Because you can't license a useful article and clothing is a useful article.  Dolls, toys, artwork on clothing and similar things can be licensed though, I think.

This isn't legal advice, as I'm not a lawyer, but it's my own belief about the scam that designers are using to control their patterns.  Based on information from the U.S. Copyright office.

And so I move on...

I didn't get much sleep last night because Professor wanted to go for a wee every hour and a half to two hours so I had to get up with him because he was barking.  And since Tom was sleeping on the couch, I had to keep Professor quiet.  Tom wasn't feeling well last night and needed to be close to the bathroom so he slept on the couch.  Which is another reason I didn't get much sleep last night.  Snoring.  And I mean window shaking snoring.

So I'm getting ready to crawl into bed in just a few minutes where I will knit on the curtain (and by the way, the curtain pattern is merely a drop stitch pattern with some lace edging you can find in a pattern nothing special) and maybe one of the blankets.  I don't think I have the brain power to focus on the mitten pattern tonight.

And lots of Farscape and Supernatural because I need something I can just listen to.  Oh, and the director's cut of Hellboy that is on OnDemand right now.  I couldn't finish it last night.  It's over 2 hours long but simply great with the back stories and character development.

If I don't finish it tonight I'll lose my place and have to start over again.

Off to bed, if the pets will let me stay there.  And let me knit.  Lately Hannibal has been crawling up through the circle of my circular needles while I'm knitting and lying down on my chest so I can't knit because I have a cat enclosed in my needles.  Or he'll get between me and the knitting so I can't see what's going on.  Or reach with his paw to put my knitting down.  Professor just barks at me to take him out.  It's like having a couple of 2 year olds.

And I now have a cat lying across my forearms while I'm trying to type.  I give up.


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Feeling in a lighter mood

I'm feeling a bit better today in spite of it being in the 40s and raining.  I did a lot of sleeping, which I think helped the pain a bit as your body is supposed to repair itself during delta sleep, and since I don't sleep a lot, my body doesn't repair itself as it should.  Or that could be just crap that I read somewhere.

I'm seething a bit.  I've been living for 8 years with bras that don't fit and a prosthesis that has been too small, not to mention mended with duct tape (over 50% of it) because I couldn't afford the $400 for new mastectomy bras and a new prosthesis.  I went online the other day out of desperation (because I'm tired of one boob riding up on my chest because it keeps slipping out of the non-mastectomy bra I bought at StuffMart) and found a site that sells both.  Since I know my bra size and the company has a guide for a weighted breast form (the same kind I was going to get from the pharmacy) it wasn't that hard to figure it all out.  The cost, including shipping and handling was....$47 and some change.  So why on earth was I going to have to spend $400 for the same thing? 

I should get my new bras and boob in a couple of weeks.  The bra is lovely with a camisole feature to it.  I hate that all fat women's shirts are so low-cut.  I have a sunken chest on one side so I can't wear low cut shirts and even ladies' undershirts are low-cut so that doesn't help at all.  I found some men's undershirts that aren't as low as women's but, as you can imagine...not terribly attractive.  So now I will have something lacy underneath.  And if I lose weight I can afford to get bras and prostheses that fit, another problem I had.  I kept putting off getting a new set because I wanted to lose all this weight first.  I mean, at $400 I couldn't afford to keep getting new prostheses very often.  Now I can.

I'm pissed at myself, too, for not checking sooner, but I honestly thought they cost that much everywhere and I thought I needed to be fitted.  But I'm pissed at the lovely health care ripoff system we have in the U. S. more.

I started on two new projects and frogged one old project.  I decided not to knit the Tree of Life afghan.  Fact is, in pictures they look great.  In real life, not so much.  I decided to start knitting things for charity, which I will decide later just who that will be.  I'm working on a pinwheel baby blanket pattern I found in my folders.  I can't find it online yet but I'll keep looking.  I'm also working on a set of mittens, a bit Nordic looking.  I'm not sure about the name of the pattern as it's not on the pages I have printed out.  And of course, the other baby blanket I'm making huge progress on.  I figure I can make lots of baby blankets using lots of great patterns, mittens, gloves, hats and scarves and still have time to make stuff for me.  I've lost interest in the sweater coat though.  Not sure what I"m going to do with the yarn instead.  I don't really need sweaters right now so I might make more blankets and afghans for us out of that yarn.  Between the blue and the off-white, I have enough for a great big afghan.

I tried to print out the Tardis blanket and it's a whole lot of pages of charts and my printer ran out of ink.  Not sure it's going to be worth it as I can't just start printing where I left off and would have to print the whole thing again.  Not to mention how much yarn it takes.  I might save it for next winter and buy up the yarn here and there.  I'll have to use Red Heart Supersaver because I just can't afford anything better than that for a blanket.  But to be honest, I like RH yarn for afghans and blankets.  I have afghans knitting or crocheted from RH that are over 20 years old and they still look great.

I also found a few patterns for lacy curtains I'd like to try out.  My front door has a huge window in it and you can see straight into the bathroom when you come up to the door.  Right now I have an insulated curtain on it, but for the summer, I'd like something light and lacy that will let light through but not let people see in.  So I'll try out some of the patterns.  A couple of them use size 10 crochet cotton, which I'm leaning toward because it's non-elastic and won't stretch out of shape hanging on a rod.  But that would take a long time and I already have some off-white yarn that would work, too.  Except for the stretching thing.  I've had knitted curtains before that didn't stretch out so I might give it a go.

Today is yucky out and I have errands to run and bills to pay and neither can wait so I'll be out and about.  I cleaned my room yesterday, washing sheets and comforter, vacuuming and de-cluttering.  That alone helped my mental state.  Now I just need to do that with the rest of the house.  Either that or never leave my room.  It's a tough choice.

Well, off to get things done so I can get home and get more stuff done.


Monday, May 23, 2011

Depression sucks

Today wasn't one of my better days.  I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever have a good one again, but I'm not going to despair just yet.  I've been hurting a lot lately, during the day which I don't normally do so much.  But today was one in which I didn't want to get out of bed.  Plus the depression dropped in on me like an anvil so I did pretty much stay in bed most of the day.

I had decided on a couple of different patterns to work on so I was excited about my new projects and determined to stay offline and work on them, which I succeeded in doing mostly this past weekend.  But then this morning I didn't want to do anything.  Nothing interested me, nothing was exciting.  I didn't go online until late afternoon.

I have bills to pay tomorrow or I would stay in bed again, but alas!  there is no one to pick up my slack so I push on through the jungle that is my life.

I may take a few days off blogging just to try to get my mojo back and see if I can work my way through this depression.  I always do but it would be nice to work through it faster this time.

I'll see everyone on the other side of this.


Friday, May 20, 2011

Finally a tidy yard

I ache and I stink.  But the yard is mowed and trimmed although I cut down the barberry bush accidentally.  It should grow back but it was going to be visible from the street this year and now it won't.  Drat!  Zach mowed the property line, leaving a strip of tall grass.  I debated what to do but I ultimately left it up to Zach.  He said he just forgot and mowed how he normally mows.  I'm not going to go out and clean it up.  Maybe this will demonstrate to the neighbor just where the property line really is.

Later on, after the next few days of rain, I'm going to plant the flower beds and try to turn the garden.  We might end up just breaking up the sod ourselves for the new part of the garden.  It will hold mostly tobacco and it's pretty sturdy once it gets to a transplanting size so it would be fine without finely chopping up the clay...I mean soil.

I worked exclusively on the baby blanket last night because Supernatural required my undivided (or nearly undivided) attention.  I made progress, about 3 inches, which is a lot with sport yarn, even using size 8 needles.  I'll probably work more on it tonight while finishing up my inventory of Supernatural.  I hadn't seen this season yet.  This will probably catch me up so I can watch it in real time next season.

I watched Charlie St. Cloud last night, thinking it would be something to watch while going to sleep but I was entranced by it and watched every minute of it.  It was wonderful.  The storyline was so good and the acting simply great.  I hadn't seen any of the High School Musical movies, only seeing Zac Efron in Hairspray, but I was very impressed with his acting in this movie.  I'll definitely put this on my dvr inventory until I can get the movie.  I do try to wait until the movies are on the sales rack, except for Harry Potter.  Those we get the bonus packages and they don't ever end up on the sales rack.  Didn't get Voyage of the Dawn Treader yet.  I'm waiting for that to be on the sales rack.  I liked it, but not enough to pay $20 for it.

Especially since we're in double tightwad mode.  Tom is going up north to host a poker party at his brother's cabin, which means money and our combined insurance is due for the quarter.  I'm never going to be able to save up for next year's property taxes at this rate.  We're definitely going to need to go back to the more stringent measures I've had to use most of the past 10 years.  Including cooking from scratch and limiting trips to town.  Not to mention trips to the store.  I may not be able to afford new glasses this year either.  That's not the end of the world as my vision is still great.  I think.

I was going to wash clothes tonight but I"m so sore I don't think I can handle the stairs so I'll do it tomorrow.  It's supposed to rain but I'll just do one load every other day and hopefully one of those times I can hang the clothes outside.  I need to get back to that as well.

My tomatoes are getting so tall.  They'll go in the ground first week of June so I need to get busy turning that part of the garden.  Plus I need more tomato cages.  I'll make do with some plastic poles I have and some other fence posts I can use because I just plan on getting a few each year.  My blueberry bushes are looking good, if not still terribly small.  Hopefully they'll grow up this year.  I hope to get the echinacea in the ground next week along with my other flowers.  And whatever else I can think to do for the yard.

I put in the screen in the front door.  I was going to do the back door and the kitchen and bathroom window but that can wait.  I've already overdone it today and I want to be able to do things tomorrow, too, instead of just putting my feet up and knitting all day.  Although that does sound like a dream day.  Still, Tom will be at work so I can get some laundry done and hopefully the bathroom scrubbed.

Time to fix supper.  Not sure just yet but it might be impossible pie, which is easy to fix and I have all the ingredients.  I'm going to make potato/leek soup for lunch tomorrow, but I can do that tomorrow.  And then a thrifty shower to get rid of all the sweat and grass all over me, then to bed for knitting and hopefully an early night.


Thursday, May 19, 2011

Planning...gardening, dyeing, and future projects for the needles

Zach is going to give me a tutorial on the camera tomorrow, after mowing and working in the yard.  We've got rain in the forecast for the next 6 days or so, so the yard must be mowed tomorrow.  Our young neighbor to the north, in spite of having a clear distinction where we mowed the property line, keeps squaring off his mowing, cutting off a good 5 feet from our front yard.  I keep hoping he will just follow the property line we mow.  I mean, what does he think we're doing?  Tom won't go talk to him, I know.  And I doubt he would pay any attention to anything I had to say so I think I'm going to plant some shrubs along the property line.  As much to keep Professor from barking insanely at what goes on up the street as any other reason.

I need to get the trimming done as well and hopefully get some flower beds planted.  I have some greenery to plant under my bedroom window because it gets so little light.  Nothing I've planted there, aside from a barberry bush seems to grow there.  I've also got a ton of columbine seeds to throw into the prairie garden on the hill.  And then echinacea on the side hill.  I might pass on strawberries this year as I've already spent a bunch and if I buy some shrubs (that might need to wait until next summer as well) I'll be spending money that needs to go into savings to pay for next year's property taxes.  We seem to live, not from pay check to pay check, but from this year's property tax bill to the next one.

I finished up season 3 of Farscape.  I decided not to buy Peacekeeper Wars yet.  I can easily get it from the library.  I think I might take a break and not spend my "allowance" next month.  I might just hang onto it for a month or two and let it grow until I can buy something bigger.  Like a birthday present for Zach in October.

I got pizza for supper tonight, the french bread kind, so everyone is on their own.  I'm not even sure if I'll eat mine tonight as I'm not particularly hungry.  We ate out, but chose the cheaper options.  Still we ate later and I'm still full from it.  I can eat a peanut banana sandwich later if I get hungry enough and save my pizza for two lunches this week.

I made good progress on the Tree of Life afghan, working on the flower garden design now.  It's a new stitch design for me so I hope I'm doing it right.  I just noticed some errata mentioned on the Ravelry page and I haven't looked at it yet.  I should check that out.  I mostly worked on the baby blanket though.  I do need to dig out the gamer squares afghan and get back to work on it, too.  It involves more attention to detail so I'm not as free to watch tv while I work on it.  Maybe I'll listen to a podcast while I work on it.  But not tonight.

I found a delightful pattern that will most definitely be next on my baby pattern list of things to make for charity.  It looks a bit complicated but just enough to make it interesting.  I love the way it looks.  Not sure I want to make it in white, though.  White on babies is only for christenings and such.  Not for daily wear.  Now I can't wait to get done with the baby blanket.

Tonight will be catching up on Supernatural and some of the documentaries I've got on dvr.  My inventory is getting in the 60% and I like to keep it under 50 if possible.  I also might get an episode of Farscape in as well.  Plus I've got several books from the library I need to read.  I'm spending less time online but I need to spend even less time.  I do feel better when I get more things done around the house and with my crafting.  I would love to start on the dyeing of my yarn but with tons of rain in the future, I don't want it hanging all over the house for days.  If I can get a few days of no rain going, I can dye some of it and let it dry indoors or take it out in the late afternoon after the clothesline gets in the shade.  I don't want to fade the yarn while it's drying by leaving it in full sun.

Well, I'm getting hungry after all and pizza sounds better than a peanut butter/banana sandwich so I'm off to stick it in the toaster oven.


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

More sleeping, tired and boring

I was almost asleep last night when Tom got home, but at least I did try.  I dozed off a couple of times but he walked into my room talking to me 3 times, which woke me up.  Then he came in and played with Professor who was sitting on top of me.  I know he doesn't intend to be mean about it, but it was obvious that he had woken me up three times before that.

So I slept until noon today.  I found some herbal sleeping medicine for him because he was complaining about not sleeping well and waking up, not being able to get back to sleep, etc.  He took one last night and said he slept really well so I hope this solves the problem.

And then I napped most of the afternoon.  It was misty with rain today so we didn't try to mow the yard.  I probably should have worked on it yesterday but I was too tired.

Tom has to work this weekend so there will be no tilling of the garden by him.  He's going up north for a poker party Memorial Day weekend and won't be able to do it then so I guess I'll have to go rent it myself.  Getting it in and out of the truck won't be easy.  I can get Zach to help but it still won't be easy.

I worked exclusively on the Tree of Life afghan last night mostly just knitting and purling rows for the dividing section on it. I think I'll work on it some more tonight and get some more work done on the baby blanket, too.  I'm not in the mood to work on anything new tonight. 

Supper is ready and I'm going to finish up the laundry and then go back to bed.  I feel like that's all I do on what has to be done in between naps and sleeping.  I keep thinking I can fix it somehow until I get to feeling like this...all worn out all the time.

I just never catch up on sleep it seems.


Tuesday, May 17, 2011

In a Farscape frame of mind

I'm just about done with season 3 of Farscape, one of the saddest ending seasons in the series.  I always tear up a bit when I hear "Talyn...Starburst."  I generally have to watch that scene a few times before I can move on.  I would like to get Peacekeeper Wars eventually.  Maybe next month.  I'm giving myself a small allowance to buy a few things each month but this month's was spent last month so I have to take a month off.  I'll finish off the season tonight.

We were going to mow the yard today but I only got about 3 hours sleep again last night.  The phone rang this morning...early.  It was the dr's office telling me the insurance company once again notified them that I had stopped taking a medication, this time my bp meds.  This is so bogus and so intrusive.  My prescription was running out but I still had a week's worth of pills left.  But no, they contact the doctor as if I'm a two year old who needs her hand held and forced to take medicine.  I hate this insurance company.  They won't pay for crap but they'll nanny me to death.

So I was a bit pissed off and didn't get back to sleep.  By 1 p.m. I was dragging and had to take a nap, which lasted every bit of 5 minutes before Professor went ape-shit over something going on outside.  I got him calmed down and tried to sleep again but a few minutes later he was barking at me to let him out.  I made Zach take care of it because I needed sleep.  I think I got about 45 minutes.  Still, I was dragging and didn't feel like mowing at all.

Zach had a mini-meltdown today over his depression, job situation, money, etc.  Plus his "helpful" friends online were giving him absolutely crap advice and then getting all pissy when, after consulting me, he decided not to take it.  They thought he should go on disability.  I told him he hadn't tried to get a job yet, hadn't shown he can't work and anyway SSDI doesn't apply to him as he hasn't paid into it yet.  He was informed by his friends that they not only give you disability, they send you to occupational therapy and help you get a job.  It took all I had to explain to Zach that his disabilities wouldn't be helped by occupational therapy and that SSDI did not, in fact, help you get a job.  What they seemed to be talking about was a state level agency, which Walker has decimated by now and there's no way Zach can get on BadgerCare or medicaid or anything else.  He just doesn't have disabilities that are debilitating enough.  His "friends" kept disagreeing with me, which confused him until I finally told him that he needed to get his butt in gear, get a job and stop staying online all day and that his depression was more about that than about any chemical imbalance in his system.

I think I got through to him because he applied for two jobs this afternoon and finally seems excited about getting a job.

Save us from friends like that!

He does believe they care about him and want to help, and I'm sure they do, but they're just like anyone else who thinks they can fix someone who doesn't need fixing.

My allergies are giving me fits today so it's just as well I didn't try to mow.  I took my allergy meds but I guess some days are worse than others.  I don't know if we'll get it mowed tomorrow as Zach has other jobs to apply for tomorrow.  He's not lazy at all, just terribly insecure.  Plus the OCD leaves him terrified where others are just nervous.

I'm going back to my plan to be online less which means that I've got to give up some stuff or I'll be online all day.  I'm thinking I'll give up the political blogs since they only upset me and stick to the spiritual and knitting/crafting blogs.  And less facebook time as well.  I've got much to accomplish, both indoors and out and I still would like to do more crafting.  I want to dye my yarn and ply it this week as well.  I got some books from the library but some of the information about kool aid dyeing contradicts what I've read in tutorials online.  I think I'm going to go with the online tutorials.

I also want to get some pictures taken of my projects along with some scenic shots of this beautiful countryside.  And that means getting out of the house and walking where it's rural and not city.  It's all uphill here and painful to walk so I think I'll drive to the marsh this week and walk there and maybe get some pictures.  It's beautiful there.

Well, tonight I'll be working on the Tree of Life afghan, which I made a lot of progress on last night while weeping over Crais and Talyn.  And the baby blanket, which is so mindlessly easy and works during those shows I have to pay attention to the tv instead of mostly listening to it.  I probably won't dig out the gamer squares afghan tonight but might tomorrow night.  I also found a vest I might make but I would have to lose some weight before I could wear it as it's not made for round people.  Although I still would like to use that yarn for a capelet if I could find a free pattern.  There is an afghan pattern I will purchase someday but it's in knitted squares so I can buy each one individually.  But she's not completely done with all the patterns yet so there's no hurry.   Plus, I'm already working on a blanket.

Well, supper is nearly ready so I'm going to finish it up and then crawl into bed.  I'll probably have the lights out by 11 and hopefully be asleep before Tom comes home.  I just hope he doesn't wake me up.


Monday, May 16, 2011

Pity party time

I just finished Teri Garr's autobiography last night.  Her ordeal getting a Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis and the subsequent social treatment was very interesting.  Some of it hit pretty close to home.  I know fibromyalgia isn't on the same level as MS but there are aspects of it, such as the invisible nature of the disability, that we share.  She talked about how her husband couldn't understand her fatigue and thought she was just being lazy.  Oh, how I can relate to that.  Tom says he understands now, but quite frankly I don't know if I believe him.  Or if I'm just projecting how I feel about myself.  There are days I cannot force myself to function no matter how hard I try.  I have things I want to get done, but I just can't get from point A to point B.  There is a barrier there that won't let me get things done.

And with depression on top of all of this, it's a hurdle that just keeps getting higher.  I have things to do that must get done and no one else will step up to the plate to do them.  Zach helps somewhat but he has his own issues that keep him in a state of paralysis as well.  I'm about 98% positive he's got Asperger Syndrome in addition to his Tourette's and OCD.  Not to mention his depression that we can't afford to treat until he gets insurance.  I've had to lay it on the line that he has to get out and be more proactive in finding a job.  He's got applications in but isn't even getting an interview, let alone a call about his application/resume.  I'd hate for him to have to go back to fast food, but if nothing comes up soon, that's just where he's going to have to go.  We can't afford for him to go without a pay check as his savings is almost gone and he still has his student loan to pay off.

He's a good kid, don't get me wrong and really wants a job, but his confidence was shattered by an interview for an internship and he doesn't bounce back because of all his other issues.  The jerk decided he needed to tell Zach everything that was wrong with him and why he wouldn't be able to get a job, as if he was doing him a favor.  He desperately needs a boost to his ego somehow.  A good interview, even if he doesn't get the job, would help.

Asshat.  I hope his company goes under.

He's going to mow the yard again tomorrow.  It's growing fast because of all the rain we've got.  I've got to get out there and trim the yard along with preparing my flower and vegetable beds.  With the little amount of energy I've got, that might take a couple of weeks.  Plus I'm pretty sure Tom won't get the garden tilled and he'll be out of town Memorial Day weekend so we'll be shit out of luck if I can't get it done by then.  I would like to just buy a tiller as we need it every year but they're not cheap.

Plus I need to scrub down the walls in the bathroom because they are covered with mold and mildew.  And then I need to scrape off old paint and put new paint on the walls and cabinets.  Again, with Tom working 6 days a week, I'm not going to have any help with that. 

I found some fabric for lining my medieval pouch.  It's got a yellow background with blue flowers and should look really well with the pouch.  I just need to get it done.  Mostly I've been working on the baby blanket because it's mindless and easy.  I've gotten some done on the Tree of Life afghan but I also need to get back to the gamer squares afghan for Zach's room. 

Mostly though I just need sleep and an escape from all the crap that keeps falling on my shoulders to carry alone.

I'm trying to fix supper but as I didn't thaw anything out and I'm out of macaroni (and forgot to get more) I can't fix macaroni and cheese.  Although I do have the generic store brand so I can crumble up some hamburger and fix the mac and cheese and call it supper.  Works for me!

Well, I've got to get busy and finish it up so I can crawl into bed.  Maybe I can get to sleep early tonight.  I saw the sun rise again this morning before I got to sleep and Professor woke me up at 11. 


Friday, May 13, 2011

Learning to love gardening, but still head over heels in love with knitting

Blogger was down yesterday so I didn't even bother trying to post.  I went to bed and knitted instead.  Seems like it was the better solution as many blogs have lost their posts from yesterday.  (ETA..apparently I lost a post or two, which pisses me off....found it!!)

Now if I can just remember what I was going to post about.

I cleaned up the garden a bit and found some pods on the tobacco stalks so I opened one up and inside were dozens of seeds, so I took all the seed pods and put them in a freezer bag.  I'll sort it all out later but I have at least 200 seeds that have fallen out without me trying to open the pods.  I'm not sure if these are hybrids so I'm going to plant some of them in the garden to see if they're good.  If they are, I'll never have to buy seeds again.  Not that they're's like $2 for a hundred seeds.  It's the shipping and handling that gets you.

Yesterday was in the 80sF but I didn't get anything done because I had to go to the store to get some OTC meds for Zach.  He was having an allergy migraine and stomach ache and everything I had for stomach pain was a year past its expiration date.  I really should keep up better.  He's feeling better today.  I hope he gets a job soon with benefits.  He's applied to the Job Center but intends to apply to private employment agencies, too.  Most jobs around here, aside from fast food, don't handle their own applications so you have to go through agencies.

I've been working steadily on the Tree of Life afghan and have gotten to the point I was before when I frogged it.  It looks so much better in an off-white rather than darker color.  The inconsistencies aren't as blatant and quite frankly, I like the way the design pops out better with Red Heart SuperSaver yarn.  Plus it's the only way I could afford to knit blankets and afghans.

I'm nearly done with the Medieval pouch but I looked at the remnant rack for material for a lining and it was mostly fleece and heavy fabrics.  The light cottons they had were definitely the wrong color.  I'll check the thrift store next and if I can't find anything, I'll look at some of the cheaper cottons they have at StuffMart.  It's not expensive at all and probably is cheaper than some of the remnants.  Especially at the thrift store.  For some reason the prices they put on stuff is more than you would pay for it new.  I think those ladies are out of touch with prices today.

I also started knitting a baby blanket.  I have no one in mind but I like to knit baby stuff and I have tons of baby sport yarn to use up so I'm working on a two-toned blanket which pattern was on the yarn's band.  It's an easy 2 row pattern that I memorized a long time ago.  I used to make them for the Haiti project at church but since I don't go to church anymore I haven't had a charity to donate to.  I might look into the food pantry or find another charity.  I think I'll also work on hats, gloves and scarves for next winter.  The library in Beaver Dam donates them every year for kids who don't have them.

It's cloudy and supposed to rain later and the temps are a lot lower, more in keeping with spring rather than summer.  Tom was going to till the garden but is working tomorrow instead.  I just don't think I have the strength to break sod to increase the garden so maybe he can get it done before the end of the month.  I don't normally put anything into the ground until June anyway, although I can turn the garden and get some stuff planted in what is already a garden area.  Something that won't come up for a week or sunflowers, corn, green beans (which I haven't bought yet), peas, etc.  And I need more tomato cages.

I still haven't learned the camera yet.  I should sit down and learn it so I can start taking pictures.  I'm not as good with technology as I would like to be.

Well, I need to do laundry today...much of it.  I should have done it yesterday but rain was predicted and I believed them so I missed a good day to hang them out on the line.  I'm sure those days are coming though.  Very soon.


Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Getting in the gardening mood

We got most of the yard mowed yesterday.  I say "we" but it was all Zach.  All I did was ready the yard for it and do some minor yard work. Which wore me out nonetheless.  I was in a lot of pain last night...a 4 tramadol night (not all at once though).  I haven't done that since chemo.  But the good news is I'm rebounding more quickly and I'm more and more active as each day goes by.  I woke up at 9 this morning and got a lot done before Tom got up.

I had errands and shopping today.  On the way to town I was listening to the weather report about a massive thunderstorm watch with pending hail, lightening and possible rotation of the storm.  But it went south of us so all we got was a bit of rain.  Still a bit overcast and I suspect we have more rain in the forecast.  All week in fact.

Tom is going to till the garden this weekend.  He was going to do it by hand but he's working so many hours and it's not going to break us to rent a tiller so I told him I thought it would be the better option.  Then I can start putting stuff in the ground.  Not the stuff in my window boxes, but stuff that will be below ground for a few more weeks.  I don't think we're going to have another freeze but until mid-June you can't safely say that.  I haven't located the seeds from last year.  I looked in the garage yesterday and the basement.  I suspect they got thrown out as they were in a plastic bag.  That's what happened last year.  Tom threw my seeds out because he thought they were trash.  I don't normally hang trash on the door knob though.

It's not going to break us and chances are last year's seeds won't be good this year so I'll get more next week when I go to town.  I need to pick up some tomato cages as well.  I've got 17 tomato plants.  I should have gotten some Roma tomatoes so I could make my own spaghetti sauce but I can use Big Boys just as well as Romas.  I'll plant some corn, sunflowers, green beans (pole), lettuce, zucchini, and some flowers as well.

What do you know!  I just went looking for the flowers I bought last week and found my bag of seeds under the cardboard recycling bag.  I should get the flowers planted this week if I can.

I reorganized my room this week and took out the coffee table and turned the dining table 90 degrees in the living/dining room and now have a lot more space.  I am more productive when my surroundings are in better order.  Chaos and I aren't close friends.  As a result of organizing my space I've been knitting a lot more and accomplishing more on the house.  I mostly knit on the Tree of Life afghan last night, but spent some time on the Medieval pouch as well.  I'm past the cats now and on the last design section.  Then I need to find some material that will look good as lining.  I'll keep an eye out at the remnant section at Stuffmart.

I also need to get back to the gamer squares.  They require a bit more concentration and what I watched last night required more eyes on the screen so I'll wait until I watch something I can mostly just listen to, like a movie I've seen before.  That's the trouble with have to watch or you miss the information.

Tomorrow I need to focus on the kitchen, cleaning out the fridge and reorganizing the pantry.  And mopping the floor, although as soon as I do Tom will spill kool aid on it.  It's a ritual of his.  Just ask him. :)

Supper tonight is bratwurst, sauerkraut, and baked beans because I don't feel like doing a lot of cooking.  I'm doing okay pain-wise today but the fatigue from all that I did yesterday and this morning is catching up with me and I want to ration out my energy so I can get stuff done tomorrow.

Off to start supper and then into bed for an evening of knitting in between letting Professor out.  Lately he's been wanting out every 10 minutes at night.  I think he's after the rat-bastard chipmunk who lives next door.  I saw him this morning on my way out the door to go shopping so I know Professor has seen him.  I had the windows open for a bit last night until Professor started barking hysterically every 5 minutes.  Between the neighborhood dog chats, the chipmunks and people 10 blocks away talking, I think I'm going to have to get the bark collar out again.  Last summer all I had to do was set it on the table.  I hope that's all I have to do this year as well.


Monday, May 9, 2011

I wasn't disappointed rain canceled the lawn mowing

Tom got the lawnmower all ready for us to start mowing today but the weather had other ideas.  A thunderstorm moved in pretty quickly so I made haste to put the lawnmower back in the garage and shut the door before it hit us.  It rained most of the day and there's not enough daylight left to dry out the grass so we will make another attempt tomorrow morning after the dew dries off.  In spots the grass is mid-calf.  We must mow it.  I have so much yard work to do, too.  Darn this stupid fatigue.

I bought a pair of capri leggings to wear to bed because I keep getting tangled up in my pajamas.  The legs are so wide that when I try to turn over, I'm lying on the opposite leg of my pjs and can't turn over.  So I wake up and detangle, then try to get back to sleep.  Most times unsuccessfully.  Maybe these will work better.  They're a relaxed fit so they shouldn't be too baggy.  What is with the wide legs on jammies these days?  I don't remember having any problems in the past.

I did a lot of knitting last night on a couple of projects, after I cleaned up my room.  I go through stages when I feel guilty for taking up the living room and cramming everything in the dining room.  I feel like I should give up my bed and just sleep on the futon at night, opening up our house again so we can walk thought it without turning sideways.  But then I think about what it was like not to have a room of my own and feel like a permanent guest in the house instead of actually living here.  Sleeping upstairs isn't an option.  I can't handle the steep attic stairs, nor Tom's smoking.  We keep the door closed to the upstairs and it's not too bad down here, but up there it's strong and I can't breathe when I have to go up there, even with the windows open.

And don't tell me to make him smoke outdoors.  It's his house, too, and he does limit it to the upstairs.  Even if he didn't smoke, I couldn't handle the stairs with my bum knees and hips and achy fibromyalgia.  It's just another reason.  Not the reason.

Zach and I watched The Sorcerer's Apprentice last night.  It was great and had a lot of wonderful lines in it. I'll admit to being a fan of Nicolas Cage and that made the movie even better.  I especially loved the scene from Fantasia in there.  But I'm not going to say what it is in case someone out there besides us hadn't seen the movie yet.

I also watched the second installment of The Barbarians by Terry Jones with Tom.  This one was about the Goths.  I love the way he tackles old mythologies that used to pass for history and the humor he uses to tell the story of the past.  Tom wasn't aware he was one of the Monty Python stars.  I've kept the one about the Celts so Tom can see that one, too.  But I will admit it's my favorite so far.  I know these are rather old documentaries but I hadn't seen them yet and as the information in them hasn't really found itself out of date, what does it matter?

I'm fixing chili tonight because there is a nip in the air and still a hint of rain to come.  Plus it's that one-pot cooking thing I love so much.  Then it's tackling the living/dining room and seeing if I can make it more efficient.  I'm going to have to give up the coffee table, for sure.  If we need something there I've got a tray table I can use.  It doesn't go as low as I'd like but it would work in a pinch.

Then off to knit and crochet.  I started the Tree of Life afghan again.  I think this is the third time.  This time I'm doing it in off-white.  I think having a darker colored yarn over-emphasized some of the increases and such.  It's blending in much better now.  Unfortunately it's Red Heart yarn, being all I could afford.  But it doesn't feel as scratchy as some of the other colors and it's knitting up well.  So far.

Then I'm nearly done with the cat portion of the Medieval pouch in blue and yellow.  The colors are really good together (Vanna's Choice yarn) and my color work is the best it's ever been.  I tweak it every time I knit with different colors and I think I finally found out how loose I need to carry the yarn across as it's nearly perfect now.  I might even try to catch some of the yarn on the back next time I do it.

I haven't been working on the sweater coat much but I'll get back to it as well.  In the meantime I'm making small progress on the gamer squares.  I've finished up two and started the Tetris one last night.  It's a little more fiddly as there are multiple color changes, which is much easier to do in crocheting, but more time consuming.  If that makes any sense at all.

I really need to sit down and learn the camera so I can take pictures of my projects.  Especially as I intend to dye the single I finished spinning.  I'll get Zach to take pictures of the different steps.  Then on to scouring my Shetland fleece.  I'm excited about that but I want to finish plying my Welsh Top first, which I'll do after I finish dyeing the singles.

I still have many other crafts I'd like to incorporate into my routine as well, including the beading and drawing/painting and writing.  I just need to organize my day, my life and my house before that's going to happen though.  Motivation is a stranger to me.

Off to fix supper and clean the living/dining room and then maybe a shower and crawl into bed for the night.  I have a lot on the agenda for tomorrow.


Sunday, May 8, 2011

Happy Mother's Day

Some gifts you can't put a price on.

I was treated to a sleep in, breakfast and looking forward to supper (with cherry cheesecake) cooked by my men.

I love the camera they gave me last week.  I mean I really love it.  But this...this was the best gift of all.  And today is for knitting, crocheting and watching movies all day.  And another nap if I want one.

I'm going to savor the day.


Friday, May 6, 2011

Not loving Stuffmart today

There was a list on the chalkboard in the kitchen so I ended up shopping after all.  But I came out with just a few items more than the list I had so I'm good.  Except for my hips, which are really hurting whenever I walk now.  I must get this weight off.  I tried to find a new bra as my mastectomy bras bit the dust a month ago.  They were over 8 years old, after all, and had been mended multiple times.  I don't know what lame-ass decided to stop carrying plus-size bras at Stuffmart but I'm hoping they roast in hell for it.  Yeah, I might be a tad upset.  I don't love being fat, you know.  I don't sit and eat until my chest explodes because I love the way it feels.  And now I can't even find a bra that fits because apparently someone decided to stop carrying them.

We've had mostly sunny today with a spot or two of rain but in the south I can see some mighty mean looking thunder clouds frowning in my direction.  I'm guessing they'll stay in the south.  I'm hoping they stay in the south.

Professor had a rough night last night.  I had to take him out several times for poo-ing.  He really wanted the back yard but I was so tired and wanting to go to bed and he gets tangled up in the back yard so I made him go out front.  Tom said when he got home that Professor went immediately to the back yard and just moped around a bit.  He didn't eat his night time treat until after Tom came home so he must have gotten something nasty out of his stomach by then.  He had been eating grass early yesterday but didn't seem like he felt bad.  This morning when he crawled under the covers to "spoon" me, I noticed he felt really warm and when he licked my hand, his tongue was warm.  I got him some baby aspirin while I was at the store (puppy aspirin is twice the amount and is the same damn stuff.)  By the time I got home, however, he was frisky and cool again.  Must have been a 24 hour something or other.  He's sunning himself on the grass out there now.

As to the other pet, Hannibal has gained a lot...he's 11 pounds now.  He still feels boney to me but maybe that's just his age.  He's certainly friskier.  I think the worm medicine worked.  Unfortunately he's frisky enough that he wakes me up in the middle of the night to pet him.   Not going to happen Mr. Cat.  We're still giving him as much as he'll eat.

Okay, I just let Professor in and he was mopey again so I gave him a baby aspirin in some raw hamburger.  He gobbled it down so that's a good sign, but I'm going to keep an eye on him this weekend.

I got the rest of the kool aid today.  I need an package per ounce of yarn and I have a pound so I got 20 packages just to be on the safe side.  I'll probably dye some of it tomorrow.  If the weather is nice, I'll hang it outside.  If not, I've got some wooden racks in the basement I can bring up here.  It's not like we ever get any company so I can just set it up anywhere there is room.  Wait...there isn't any room anywhere.  Dang.  I'll figure something out.

I frogged the medieval pouch last night because I really hated the colors.  I'm going with blue and yellow now.  So far I like it but I haven't gotten very far yet.  I didn't work on anything else though as I was too busy taking Professor outside.  I finally crashed about 11 p.m.  I heard Tom come home but I went back to sleep after that and woke up again at 2 to let Professor out again.  He wanted out at 6 a.m. but I told him to get back into bed.  Apparently he had already gone on the puppy pads.

Tonight I'm hoping to get more done on the sweater coat.  I pulled the Navajo coat out and can't remember what size hook I was using.  I didn't use the size it called for but I can't remember how many sizes I went up.  I guess I'll just have to use trial and error.  I love the way it looks so I should get back to it.  And the gamer squares afghan I'm working on for Zach.  I didn't find any peach colored yarn there so I think I'll go upstairs and see if there is anything in the bin I found the other day.  It's very old yarn but if it's the right color and weight, I don't care.

Professor is out back now wading through the grass.  I can tell by the way the grass hits his chin that it's time to mow this weekend.  And time to start digging the garden.  I wish we could rent a tiller but that's probably not going to happen.  It's a tiny garden.

I'm going to take a short nap after Professor comes back in.  I don't think I'm up for walkies tonight and with him acting this way, I don't think he is either.


Thursday, May 5, 2011

Spring one day, winter the next

I was digging through my cabinets looking for yarn when I discovered a billion skeins of linen shaded worsted Vanna's Choice yarn.  Well, maybe not a billion but enough for a long cape, which I would love to own.  So I've been looking on Ravelry for a cape pattern.  I haven't found what I want yet but I'm in no hurry as I've got a few other things going on as well.

I was going to dye yarn today but it's very gloomy and cold today.  One day of sunshine, one day of gloom.  It's spring in Wisconsin.  So instead I'm coughing my head off because I stopped taking my allergy pills the past couple of days, thinking that I was doing fine.  I still do the nasal spray because the dr told me that has to build up in your system so I need to take it all the time.  But the pills...only as needed.  Apparently I needed them.  I'm feeling crummy and my chest is getting sore from all this coughing.  I'll keep taking them until I can get this house dried out and get rid of the mold and mildew.  That should happen sometime next year, I think.

So I'll dye the yarn later.  As it turns out, I don't have enough kool-aid.  It's one package per ounce and I have a pound of singles so I need at least 6 more packages.  Next time I go to the store, I'll get them, but I'm not making a special trip (although I hear that gas is supposed to be coming down in price very soon.)

In the meantime, I'm crocheting on Zach's gamer squares afghan, my medieval pouch and the sweater coat.  I could make several of the medieval pouches as they take so little yarn and I have a lot of stash busting I could do.  I could give them away as gifts, maybe.  I continue to look for other patterns that use up bits of yarn as well.

I took Professor walkies last night.  Just around the block but considering we live on the side of a steep hill, that was a grueling walk.  By the time we had the return trip up the hill, my hips were hurting so much I was struggling to put one foot in front of another.  I have to get this weight off.  But we did have an incident on the way home.  Professor was still walking briskly on the flat portion of our block when he started barking furiously.  I looked up and a big black dog was running toward us.  I picked Professor up and just cuddled him, holding very still.  The dog started sniffing Professor and the black dog's hackles were raised so I was a bit nervous.  The owner came running frantically, telling me the dog wouldn't hurt us and sure enough, he didn't.  He got done sniffing and went back to his house.  But his mates...two Yorkies...thought Professor was someone they wanted to know.  I put him down because he's such a wuss when it comes to other dogs and I felt like he needed to socialize a bit but he kept trying to crawl up my legs or in between my ankles because one Yorkie was relentless.  They were his size but he was terrified of them.  He was ready to go head to head with the big dog but the little ones scared him to death.  I made him walk and the owner finally got the Yorkies inside the house and Professor was willing to head home.  Acting, of course, as if he had won some victory.

I didn't have a lot of pain after I got home aside from the screaming hips and they eased off after a tramadol.  I went ahead and took another one before bed and slept just fine (although not long enough) but today I'm walking stiff and sore.  I took ibuprofen but that didn't seem to help.  I'm going to grab a hot shower in a bit and see if that helps.  I should walk more regularly to get back in shape a bit but I'll choose flatter ground from now on.  It means having to drive somewhere to find flatter ground, but I'm not going to be able to walk otherwise.  Besides, it just started raining so I can't go out tonight.

I think I"m going to be unimaginative for supper:  hamburgers and french fries.  Between the incessant coughing and the pain, I'm going to stay off my feet as much as possible today.  Hopefully tomorrow I'll be more active and do some walking where I don't hurt myself so much.  And I hope to have the camera mastered by tomorrow as well.  I'm just too tired to mess with it today.

Tonight I'll work on the gamer squares and my other projects (see the post below for links) and just stay in bed the rest of the night.  Nothing urgent needs taking care of and I don't need to shop tomorrow...just make a deposit of our tax check into savings.  Not even the library.  So it should be a quick trip to town and back with no other stops.

Off to grab that shower before supper.


Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Happy Star Wars Day!

May the fourth be with you!

Two of my green peppers are peeking through the soil.  Hopefully the rest will follow suit soon.  They'll be pretty small when I try to transplant them outdoors so I might wait on putting them out until mid-June.  We have lots of bunnies so I want to get them as big as possible before setting them out in the garden.  I didn't fence in the garden last summer and didn't have any problems.  Professor killed off one generation of bunnies last summer but I'm sure there were other mother rabbits out there propagating so I'll just play it by ear.  If I see nibbles on my veg, I'll fence it in.

I've got a cat sitting next to the keyboard, just inches away from my face, glaring at me.  I think he wants food.  He does this during the night, too, waking me up at least twice a night for either cuddles or food.  We're having a staring contest and I lost, sadly.  He's got a mean glare.

I'm sorry about not having pictures yet.  I'm still trying to figure out the camera.  Zach is supposed to help me figure it out but I haven't gotten together with him yet.  I had errands today because a book came in at the library and I was running low on some things that could have waited but it was sunny and I wanted to get out in it.  Professor wanted walkies today but I'm still achy and so very tired and I have the laundry that I didn't finish yesterday to finish today.

I just started supper...Impossible and easy one pot dinner.  Well, fairly cheap.

Zach wants an afghan/blanket for his room and I found these squares.  He's picked out some of them and since I had most of the colors, I just picked up two more that I didn't have.  I can start the afghan at any time, which might be tonight.  I do need to get back to the Navajo coat but I've completely lost interest in it.  I forgot to get rubber gloves for dyeing my yarn but I think I might have some in the kitchen somewhere so I hope to get that started tomorrow.  And I'm nearly done with the cats on the medieval pouch pattern.  Plus I need to get back on the sweater coat.  I'm close to finishing up the back, which is why I keep putting it off.  I'm fine just working the pattern but when it comes to measuring because I'm close to the end, I lose interest.  I'm always afraid I'll go too far and need to rip back on it so I measure every other row...which gets tedious since it's long and I only have one place to measure, which involves moving pets out of the way so I have room.

Why is it moms end up doing all the pet care, no matter whose animal it is?

I need to weed out my daffodils and tulips.  The grass is as tall as the blooms.  Ugh!  I hate weeding.  I'm not a keen gardener when it comes down to it, but I like the results and since no one else in the family will do it, I guess it's up to me.  Sort of like that pet thing.

Seriously achy again today in spite of the sunshine.  I'm moving more so that might be part of it, getting more done but I still have such a long way to go, sadly.  I'm thinking of counting calories again.  Getting some of this weight off will help movement and hopefully pain, but I suck at dieting and once I'm there, I panic and eat everything in the house.  It's not about will-power at all.  I quit smoking several years ago and haven't smoked a cigarette since then, and that was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life, as Tom still smokes and I had cigarettes and cigarette smoke around me all the time.  This is different.

It is nice to see the brilliant green on the ground again...until I have to get the lawn mower out.  Then I'll start bitching again.  I'm like that, you know.  I also need to fertilize my fruit trees and bushes before another week goes by.  And I've got some flower seeds to sow as well.  I want lots of flowers this year.  Got to bring the bees back and give them something to eat.  Year by year, I make improvements on the yard. 

Well, off to get the laundry folded and another load in the dryer.  I might wash another load, too.  I'm working on cleaning up the basement, too.  Then after supper, I'm falling into bed again.  I hope to get to sleep early enough tonight so I can get up before noon tomorrow.  It's hard when you can't get even 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep so I sleep as long as I can.


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

I guess you need the dreary days to appreciate the sunny ones

It's a bit cold and rainy today so I turned the furnace on again.  I'm just not keen on shivering in 55F temps anymore.  I've only got the thermostat sitting on 60F and that feels quite comfortable, but I'm not going to sit in a cold house this spring.  Besides, the cold and rain is making me even more achy.  I was up most of the night because of the pain and I had taken all the pain meds I could.  Some of it might have been all that running up and down the stairs doing laundry, which I need to finish today.  I must muddle through the pain to get to the other side or else I'm never going to get back in shape.  But that doesn't mean I need to abuse myself doing it.  Baby steps, after all, are what we all start out with.

Stranding the yarn rather than catching it works much better on the bag I've been working on.  The cat is smooth now and not dimpled and I'm not carrying the yarn too tight or too loose, so I must be doing something right.  I'll be lining the bag so the strands won't get caught on anything and it's a small bag anyway.  I'm doing it in yellow, light green and white.  Just because I had those colors lying around.  I can make another bag later in blue and yellow.  Not sure what I'll do with the bags but they are a nice size to carry when I'm riding my bike (and I do intend to ride my bike this summer) or walking.  I plan on making them over the shoulder bags in spite of how small they are because nothing stays on my shoulder (I must have sloping shoulders because my bra strap won't stay up either) and I hate carrying bags on my arms.  My mp3 player fits in my jeans pocket but I do have shorts that don't have pockets so this would be good for that.  Plus if I walk at night, which I love, I could slip my little flashlight in there as well.

I do need to get started on walking, especially for Professor's sake.  He loves walkies and it might tire him out enough to let me sleep at night.  But as it's rainy and cold today we're not starting that right now.  Maybe tomorrow.

I'm determined to limit myself to one trip a week to town as gas is now over $4 a gallon and I have the truck, which gets lousy gas mileage.  But it's better that Tom drives the car since his work is over 25 miles away.  Shopping is just about 15 miles away, but more with all the errands around town.  Our own bitty city doesn't have any shopping and the library isn't open but for a few hours a day and I'd have to get the books sent over from other libraries anyway.  So, since I have to go into town anyway, I just use that library.

I'm cooking biscuits and gravy with sausage and eggs for supper tonight.  Tom loves it and with him working late, I'm trying to figure out meals that are a bit special without costing a lot.  This is a fairly cheap meal, all things considered.  It would be better if I made the biscuits from scratch but I'm not that far along yet.  I do need to bake bread tomorrow.  I'll use the bread machine which only makes one loaf at a time but next time I hope to do it all by hand.  I also need to dig out my tightwad books and get motivated to get back to being extremely frugal.  Tom really wants a fishing kayak by the end of summer so I'm hoping we can swing it.

I'm still taking my allergy meds.  The nasal spray seems to be helping a lot with the sinus drainage so I'm not coughing a lot during the day.  The dr told me to keep taking the spray all the time during the height of the allergy season for me, which unfortunately is all year since I'm allergic to mold and mildew in the winter and pollen in the summer.  Maybe August I can take a break from it.  But she says it's mild enough that it won't hurt to take it all the time anyway.  I don't need the generic Claritin daily...just when I get symptoms.  So I took one today for the first time in a week.  I still must get all the mold and mildew cleaned up though.  That would help so much.

Well, supper is almost ready so I need to finish it up, then get the laundry finished up and crawl into bed.  It was after 10 p.m. last night when I finally got into my pajamas and settled down.  I only knit for an hour before I turned the lights off, but I woke up before Tom got home and took another pain pill and since I wasn't comfortable taking three in one night, tried to let that hold me over until morning.  It didn't but I eventually fell asleep out of exhaustion.  Woke up stiff and achy but I only took an ibuprofen.  I have no idea why I hoard these pills.  I have enough to take 3 a day or more if I need it.  I might have to just bite the bullet and start doing that.

Well,  I hope tomorrow is better than today but today was still not as bad as I've been doing so I must be making progress.  Minute progress, but progress nonetheless.


Monday, May 2, 2011

Laundry Monday

Another day of sunshine but it was again very windy out there.  I almost hung a load of clothes out but I was afraid I'd have to drive all over the neighborhood looking for them later on in the afternoon.  So they are drying in the dryer...which means I'm getting more laundry done today because I can continue into the night.

Alas, laundry is all I'm getting done today though.  And I'm having to push myself to get it done.  I haven't rebuilt my pain tolerance since messing about with my medication for fibromyalgia.  I still tend not to take a pain pill during the day but now the pain is keeping me from getting things done rather than getting things done is keeping  me from thinking about the pain.  Well, that and the incredible fatigue.  I just feel like I'm not getting any sleep, and yet I can't seem to nap in the afternoons.

I haven't used my camera yet.  I'm going to learn how to use it tonight or tomorrow and get some pictures for the blog because I got my fleece today.  I was so stunned to get it so soon as it didn't ship until Saturday.  And it's lovely!  I haven't opened it yet but I love the look of it:  Shetland wool.  Beautiful!  Maybe tomorrow I'll open it up for the pictures.  I still need to research kool-aid dyeing and get that done.  After I get the kitchen cleaned up.  I don't have another option for dyeing, like the basement or another room.  I'll be extra careful and since it's only kool-aid right now, I don't think I need separate rooms or utensils.  Definitely with the chemicals I'll need separate stuff, but I still won't have a separate room for dyeing.

I'm not at all happy with the bag I'm working on.  I don't know why when I carry colors I get these dimples all over.  I'm not pulling it too tight, it's just that the crossover in the back pulls the front part back and it looks like a small dimple.  I can't do intarsia because there are places in the design that call for the different color.  I'm better off not not crossing over at all, just letting the color carry over until it's needed again.  I'm planning on lining it anyway so it won't get caught.  Otherwise my colorwork is good.

Had to make a trip down to the basement to swap out more clothes.  I put the last load for the night into the washer so it will be a while before I can crawl into bed.  Darn it!  I hate the stairs because they're so steep and my legs aren't the best at climbing stairs.  It's one of the reasons I have my bedroom in the living room, because I get up so much at night for one reason or another and climbing the steep stairs (the upstairs used to be an attic) hurts my poor arthritic knees, not to mention all the aches and pains from the fibromyalgia.  I would love to have a house with everything on one floor but Tom wouldn't even look at them when we were house-hunting.  They weren't interesting enough.

I need to find all the seeds and starts I had put aside for the yard.  I thought they were on the basement door handle but they're not so I don't have a clue where they can be.  Maybe the garage?  I guess I'll go out there and look tomorrow if it's nice again.  I need to sort out my tools anyway and get the lawn mower ready to go.  We need to mow already, what with all this rain we've been getting.

I'm hoping that very soon, my pain tolerance will get back to its previous level and this fatigue will go away long enough for me to get some things done.  In the meantime, I'm going to have to push myself to get the necessities done before I get so swamped I end up hiding in my bed for the rest of the summer.


Sunday, May 1, 2011

Drowsy Sunday

Last night's lack of sleep was my fault.  I ate a small sandwich before bedtime and had an acid reflux attack.  After that I was afraid to go to sleep again so I was awake until 6 a.m or so.  Professor wanted out at around 10 so I got up and let him out then went back to bed.  I had a vivid dream that woke me up around 11:30 so I just got up.  I've been so sleepy all day.

I'm not cooking tonight as everyone seems to have grabbed leftovers or sandwiches to eat so I think I'm going to crawl into my pajamas and go to bed.  I got caught up a bit on my Doctor Who inventory on dvr along with some Graham Norton but I fell asleep watching the highlights of the wedding. 

Zach and Tom gave me my Mother's Day gift early...a new camera and tripod.  I think they gave it to me because I had been grousing that Mother's Day was a contrived holiday and didn't want to celebrate it.  I love the gift though.  My camera was giving me trouble.  I hope this one works out well.  I'd like to do some photography and learn all I can about it.  Not sure what I would do with it, but at the very least I could add photos to my blog.

It was lovely again today but the winds were so strong that it was hard to stand up at times.  Definitely at Stuffmart, which is on a fairly high plateau with nothing to break the wind.  I washed and blow-dried my hair before we left.  Which was a big mistake.  By the time I got to the truck in the driveway, I was a mess with my hair tangled and going every which way.  Next time I'll put it up in a barette.

Game of Thrones is on tonight but I think I'll give it a pass.  I certainly have tons of other things to watch even if Sean Bean is in it.  I can always get my Bean-fix by watching LOTR again.  And again.  I watch the entire set, including all the doc, once a year.

My green peppers still aren't coming up.  I watered them even more so I hope that helps a bit.  With the sunshine today, maybe they'll start peeking through the dirt.  One of my tomato plants withered and I accidentally broke it off trying to re-pot it.  I'm not going to plant another one.  I think I have plenty.

Well, I'm off to bed.  I don't care if I do doze off right now.  I'll figure out a sleeping schedule later.  I'm so tired of being tired and sleepy all the time.  Hopefully I'll start getting some rest soon.  As much as I love the pets, I would love to sleep through the night.  I can't lock them out of my room as I have no wall and no door.