Well, dang it! I got every bit of 30 minutes of sleep last night before giving up and making up the couch at 6:30 a.m. I dozed off on the couch a few hours later and Zach abducted Professor so I could sleep for a few hours so we could make it to the vet's appointment. We made it but I'm in sticker shock as the visit cost $221.10. Labs are incredibly expensive. Apparently lower middle class can't afford pets anymore. We won't find out anything for a few days but Hannibal has lost half his weight and is down to 8.9 pounds. He was very good at the visit, staying in the scale during the entire exam and being quite docile during his labs. But he made a beeline for the front door when we finally got home.
I had to stop and pick up a prescription so I got pizza for supper tonight. I actually plan on going to bed around 8 tonight. I'm so stinking tired.
I did finish the curtain and it's hanging up on the front door. Looks very good there. I worked a few more rows on the pinwheel baby blanket and several rows on the two color baby blanket (sport yarn). I don't think I'll start the bathroom curtain today as I'll do well to make up the bed before I fall into it. I'm thinking of switching my head around so I can sleep less wonky on the couch/bed. I have to prop myself up in the corner because I can't sleep flat and that leaves me cattycorner on the bed. I sometimes end up hanging over the side with my feet sticking out of the covers by a mile. I think if I sleep on the other side, I can sleep wedged in the corner so I can fall asleep watching tv by sleeping on my side instead of trying to sleep on my back. I never rest well on my back for some reason.
I'm still pondering what to do weight loss wise. I really appreciate my niece's suggestion because she's probably the coolest and most unconditionally accepting relative I've got and if I was going to go on a diet, it would be counting calories. It's just that diets create an obsession in me that overwhelm my senses and I end up losing back what I've lost and then some. I suspect that most of my weight gain has had to do with the aftermath of the many diets I've been on since I was only 10 pounds overweight when I initially went on a diet. Now I'm 100 pounds overweight. It's that panic from feeling hungry. Not just deprived, but sincere gut-gnawing hunger. I would lie awake at night with my stomach growling so much I couldn't sleep. On 1600 calories a day, so it's not like I was on a starvation diet. And eventually I get to the point where I'm gaining weight on that 1600 calories. With absolutely no cheating at all. I gained back 10 pounds the last time I did this, after losing 60. So I'm gaining weight on 1600 calories, with an hour of exercise 6 days a week and I'm feeling like I'm starving.
So I eventually can't take it anymore and I binge. And the binge is neverending. This happens with every single diet I've ever been on so I just can't do it anymore. I can't put myself through that torture. And torture it is. I'll figure something out but it won't be a diet.
Well, I'm going to go lie down for a bit and watch some tv. I don't think I'll knit much tonight because I don't have the energy to. And yet I'll probably sleep for a couple of hours and be up the rest of the night. I hate these insomnia cycles.
TTFN
I had to stop and pick up a prescription so I got pizza for supper tonight. I actually plan on going to bed around 8 tonight. I'm so stinking tired.
I did finish the curtain and it's hanging up on the front door. Looks very good there. I worked a few more rows on the pinwheel baby blanket and several rows on the two color baby blanket (sport yarn). I don't think I'll start the bathroom curtain today as I'll do well to make up the bed before I fall into it. I'm thinking of switching my head around so I can sleep less wonky on the couch/bed. I have to prop myself up in the corner because I can't sleep flat and that leaves me cattycorner on the bed. I sometimes end up hanging over the side with my feet sticking out of the covers by a mile. I think if I sleep on the other side, I can sleep wedged in the corner so I can fall asleep watching tv by sleeping on my side instead of trying to sleep on my back. I never rest well on my back for some reason.
I'm still pondering what to do weight loss wise. I really appreciate my niece's suggestion because she's probably the coolest and most unconditionally accepting relative I've got and if I was going to go on a diet, it would be counting calories. It's just that diets create an obsession in me that overwhelm my senses and I end up losing back what I've lost and then some. I suspect that most of my weight gain has had to do with the aftermath of the many diets I've been on since I was only 10 pounds overweight when I initially went on a diet. Now I'm 100 pounds overweight. It's that panic from feeling hungry. Not just deprived, but sincere gut-gnawing hunger. I would lie awake at night with my stomach growling so much I couldn't sleep. On 1600 calories a day, so it's not like I was on a starvation diet. And eventually I get to the point where I'm gaining weight on that 1600 calories. With absolutely no cheating at all. I gained back 10 pounds the last time I did this, after losing 60. So I'm gaining weight on 1600 calories, with an hour of exercise 6 days a week and I'm feeling like I'm starving.
So I eventually can't take it anymore and I binge. And the binge is neverending. This happens with every single diet I've ever been on so I just can't do it anymore. I can't put myself through that torture. And torture it is. I'll figure something out but it won't be a diet.
Well, I'm going to go lie down for a bit and watch some tv. I don't think I'll knit much tonight because I don't have the energy to. And yet I'll probably sleep for a couple of hours and be up the rest of the night. I hate these insomnia cycles.
TTFN
2 comments:
Cue the broken record.
Try Weight Watchers and read that book by Geneen Roth I worship.
It's not a diet, it teaches how to change your eating habits and you get 49 bonus points a week to do with what you please.
Out of 4 weeks of being on it I only had an issue one week which was an emotional storm of the dog and mourning for my sister.
I've tried WW before and I'm just so afraid of spending more money on something I'll just fail at. I've spent a small fortune in the past 20 years on diets, diet programs and diet books that I'm just reluctant to spend anymore. Not to mention I've got a hamburger budget and all the diet programs out there call for all these expensive cuts of meat I can't afford.
I'll see if they've got her book at the library and order it. Thanks.
Post a Comment