Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Fatigue and pain

I talked to the rheumatologist about both my pain levels and the fatigue (and fog that goes along with fibromyalgia.)  It was the first time I felt comfortable talking with her about it as freely as I did.  I admitted that sometimes the pain pills aren't enough, that I end up spending the night tossing and turning or getting up to walk about because the pain is so bad but that I knew I didn't want to go on anything stronger.  She really listened and asked me how many nights a week that happened.  When I got to thinking about it, it was really only five or six times a month so she told me to remind myself when I'm in that much pain, that it won't last and that I will have relief.  Mind, I'm not in excruciating pain.  It's not a stabbing, throbbing pain.  It's more a burning ache and inability to find a position that is comfortable.  But it's still very debilitating all the same.

I appreciated that she listened and offered up some advice.  She is very good with pain management and gives me more than I actually use in a month because she knows that not having enough pain meds leads to hoarding.  Which I do anyway because I lived for over 10 years with no pain relief at all and only a pat on the head and a warning that it was all in my mind and wasn't real pain.  So that I can take a pill and get some relief even if it isn't always enough but I worry that I'll run out or that I won't have the money to go to the dr to get more.  She did warn me to stop hoarding though and to take them when I'm in pain and not wait until I'm in PAIN.

She also addressed the fatigue, which I had been reluctant to talk about since my gp always tells me it's depression and if I would just take anti-depressants (I would have to go off my pain meds for that) I could sleep again.  The rheumatologist agreed with me that lack of sleep most likely is why I'm depressed, not the other way around.  She had no answers medically but told me to stop being so hard on myself if I can't function because of lack of sleep and to quit fretting on those days I am too tired to do anything.  She did suggest I look into non-medical ways to change my sleep habits if possible, like maybe not waiting up for Tom anymore, asking him to be more quiet when he comes in and getting help with the pets.  I guess I will try that although I don't think it will work all that well.  But I will try.

So today I'm all achy but haven't taken anything for it and I don't know why.  I don't know why I sit here in pain and don't take at least ibuprofen for it.  I guess I'm still saving up for when it's PAIN.

Supper is in the oven and as soon as it's done I'll eat and then go to bed.  I took a nap today but got woken up three times in the space of an hour.  Much like last woken up at least 6 times from either Professor barking or the phone ringing.  I really do need a proper bedroom instead of a living room converted into one.



Anonymous said...

Good Doctors are few and far between, as you unfortunately know. It sounds like she listens, which is a rarity in this day and age. I can understand waiting until PAIN and hoarding pills. The only medication I can take for my migraines is Tylenol 3. The new Triptan drugs have literally landed me in the hospital twice. I am a rare case in that most migraine patients are helped by these "miracle drugs". My neurologist was beyond hesitant to prescribe a narc because it just isn't done for migraine. To that end, she gives me a prescription for 20 that is to last me an entire year. It is basically what I take after a 3 day migraine that nothing else has helped and I'm trying to avoid an ER visit. I would love if I had the security of knowing I could take one on the first day so I don't have to suffer for 3 days but I know if I take too many I'm screwed. I get so angry because of idiot people who buy and sell pain medication to get high I am now forced to be treated like a drug seeker.

Sorry for blabbing, but this one hits close to home. I hope that since you have had a good talk wih your doctor you feel more comfortable using your medication. As for the interruptions at night, can you turn the phone off? Can you take turns with Zach & Tom taking care of The Professor? It doesn't seem fair that you shouldn't have help.

Hugs and sleepy glitter ;)

Kathy said...

You're not blabbing; you're telling it like it is. My gp won't give me more than 2 tramadol a day because she's afraid I'll kill myself if she gives me more or that I'll become dependent on them. Sheesh!

People who haven't felt PAIN don't understand it. They compare it to the worst pain they've ever experienced and then drop it down a notch or two. Because if they don't feel it, you don't either.

And people in the medical field should distinguish between drug seekers and people with legitimate pain but they don't. Too lazy and too unconcerned.

I wish you could find a dr like Dr. O. She's amazing.